Ask our agony Aunt
This week's problem has been sent in by Chris.
I am 52. I was divorced. Nearly two years ago, I married a man who has never been married before and is rather set in his ways. He is stubborn and will never back down. My husband is still very friendly with and close to his ex-girl friend and her daughter. A year ago he bought a house which we go to every weekend. He refused to give me a key to it but a spare set has been given to this ex-girl friend and her daughter. I only discovered this because we were locked out one day and he mentioned they have a spare key. I’m sure this girl is not my husband's child and his closeness to the two of them upsets me. He is a London black cab driver and I am certain he visits them regularly whilst at work on his regular 12noon - 12midnight shifts. He has made it clear I have accept the situation he'll be off.
There are other problems too. After our marriage I found that my husband made a Will in favour of his ex-girl friend's daughter. He loathes my son and daughter and has said he doesn't want them to benefit from his life savings. If something happens to him, I’m almost certain I will have to fend for myself and although that will be hard, I think I can manage. Yet I am unhappy that he doesn't trust me enough to leave me something, even if only the right to live on the interest of his savings and then leave the capital to his ex-girl friend and her daughter should I survive him.
I also think he is mean. He pays me £240 a month to live in my house and has had a key since before we were married. We spend weekends at his place and he pays all the bills there. But he expects me to pay my share of holidays if I want to tag along. I work for a local authority and am on just a third of his earning capacity.
Because he is so much better in a lot of ways to my ex I accept the situation but deep down it hurts. Am I being unreasonable? I would love to know what you and your readers think of the situation. Would anyone else there accept this arrangement?
Have your say...
Be the first to leave your comment.
Send To A Friend
Printer Friendly
Add Page To Favorites
Green Issues With Michael Wale
Apple Lovers
Michael Wale visits a Herefordshire orchard brought back to life by the public.
Spotlight
Meet 50connect's Columnists
From relationship advice to environmental issues; life as an ex-pat living in France and the highs and lows of going back to study; read the latest from our regular contributors.
Bookmark with:
Don’t know what this is?
Read the 50connect Guide To Social Bookmarking.