Preparing for a New Relationship and Meeting Prospective Dates after 50: A Guide for Men
Posted on: 26 September 2014 by Peter Greene
At 50, life may seem to come to a standstill if you lose a beloved one in a tragic accident, due to an illness, or if you get divorced.
You may not be in your best shape and you may feel lonely and depressed.
But things aren't as bad as you think. You have fewer responsibilities and much less stress than when you were younger. You are in control of most things in your life now and are much wiser. There's a lot you can do to beat loneliness but you can also date a new person and share your life with her if that's how you want things to be.
Here are a few things you need to know if you think your dating skills have rusted and even if you think you're ready to date.
Prepare Yourself to Start Dating Again
To be able to accept a new person into your life, you need to accept the past and the present. If you are dwelling on the past- the death of your spouse, or a failed relationship, you need to get over it. If you don't, you'll always be comparing other women to your ex. This won't be fair to the person you date.
Moreover, you are looking for someone with whom you can have a good time. The other person is also looking for the same. If you are constantly under depression and unhappy, you'll not be good company for whomever you date. You'll make them feel depressed too. So deal with your moods first and then consider dating. Don't be shy of approaching a counselor if you need to.
Be realistic when you look for a suitable date; you're not in your 20s or 30s anymore. Realize that wisdom and maturity in a woman are far attractive features than skin-deep beauty. Don't feel low when a series of dates turns out to be disaster after disaster. Be patient and let things work at their own pace.
Looking for a Date
Now that you're ready to start dating, you need to find a date for yourself. Whether you have battled grief, anger, or resentment, you can't sit at home doing nothing but watching TV. You need to go out and do something.
Perhaps you'd like to pursue a course; take up an activity; or join a gym, a local club, or a library. These are likely places where you can come across people you would like to date. You can also look up people online- maybe someone you knew and liked when you were in college or befriended when appearing for an interview.
You can also create an account on a reputed online dating site. A lot many people find ideal partners this way. Be aware of fraudulent people though.
On your part, be sure to update your latest pictures instead of those taken 20 years back. If you have put on a lot of weight or if you look significantly old than you looked years back, your date is bound to feel cheated and you don't want that. She may also think that you're hiding a lot of other things from her.
Dating the Date
If you've finalized a date and time to meet your date, congratulations! Now you need to focus on impressing your date.
Wearing clothes that you like will boost your confidence and make you feel good about yourself. But that doesn't mean you can turn up for the date in ill-fitting clothes.
The person that you have invited or who has invited you may take pains to dress well and look good for you. Don't show up at the venue without making an effort to look good as this could put your date off instantly.
Decide well in advance what you want to wear for your first date. If you want to put across your individual style, get in touch with a company that specializes in personalized tee shirt printing and choose a design that catches your fancy. This way you can pick a tee for yourself that isn't rude or offensive in any way to your date or women in general. If you've been looking for t-shirts with decent prints but haven't been able to find any, you know what to do.
Wear formal clothes if the venue requires you to. Do inform your date about the same; she will appreciate it. Pay attention to your shoes; polish them if wearing formal ones. If you haven't already washed your sneakers clean, you may as well go barefoot instead of wearing a grubby pair of shoes.
Get a haircut and get rid of unsightly skin tags, or anything that needs getting rid of. If you don't take care of your hands and feet, a visit to a salon for a manicure and pedicure will prove to be useful. On the day of the date, bathe, shave, splash on some cologne and get into your best clothes.
Lastly, remember to not talk too much about yourself or your past relationships. Never talk ill of your exes. Make your date comfortable by asking her about her life but don't get nosy; show a genuine interest in her.
It may be tough to decide if you are ready for another relationship. But only you can decide for yourself. If the past still hurts, give yourself time to recuperate. You don't want to rush into a relationship that will only make matters worse for you.
(Image Credit: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/531495193497414618/)